Running headlong into 40

Here it is... it's official. Today, Sept 28, 2008, I turn 40. I've been wondering what to make of this milestone in life.... the mid-life.... will there be a crisis coming? I've been thinking about it this past week or so.

Crazy week
Am I trying to prove that coming to 40, I'm still able to go all out with a crazy schedule? This past week is as crazy as they get. List of things I did
1. 4 day recording session for the song Thousand Faces from Sunday to Thursday morning, including one overnight session.
2. Spent 30+ plus hours in one go, even sleeping in the office
3. Playing piano for Worship for work on Tuesday morning, including rehearsal on Monday afternoon.
4. Helping to colour correct and master the sound for a couple of short films
5. Authoring a DVD for a customer
6. Helping colleague design DVD menus for our own DVD
7. Rehearsal on Monday night and Saturday afternoon for church choir performance on Sunday morning
8. Rehearsal on Saturday morning for church worship service on Sunday
9. Rehearsal on Saturday night for Soul2Soul band performance on Sunday afternoon.
10. Doing sound for choir and worship for 2 services on Sunday morning
11. Doing sound for Soul2Soul band on Sunday afternoon
12. Shoot staff video interview on Thursday afternoon
13. Recce venue on Friday for Soul2Soul performance on Sunday
14. Lead vision dinner team meeting on Wed afternoon

I'm getting tired just looking at the list.... hopefully next week will be much better.


Weddings and funerals
It seems that I've been attending a disproportionate number of weddings and funerals these past few months. It's great attending weddings, and they are usually well planned ahead.... but the funerals get to me. Thank God there weren't any who were directly related or personal friends. Mostly close relatives of colleagues, church mates, business contacts. There's a period in life were we tend to have a bunch of weddings of friends of our own age. That period is mostly over for me. However, now that I work with younger people, I am going through another round of weddings. However, my peers are now at that age where their parents or even older siblings are passing on. It's really an emotional roller coaster sometimes, and makes me think about my own life journey.

So what lies ahead after 40? I don't know. I don't even know what I'm going to do next year after my time with SCCC is done. That's life.

A haunting memory of 9/11

7 years ago, I arrived in New York city on September 10th 2001, ready for a series of meetings in NY and Boston. After that, my dad and I planned to travel to Vancouver to visit my sister there. Little did we know how our plans would be radically changed.

The next morning, we went out early for breakfast at one of the numerous New York eating places. We were close to the southern end of Central Park, on the Avenue of the Americas, or 6th Avenue. When we got out of the restaurant, I got a call from my mom on my phone saying "The World Trade Centre is on fire". I immediately thought it was the world trade centre in Singapore. Little did we know that the first plane had struck while we were in the restaurant. We quickly found a TV and watched with unbelief as the pictures unfolded onscreen about the NY and Washington strikes. We walked back to 6th Ave were we could look straight down about 4 miles or so to where the WTC was actually burning. As we were watching from quite a distance, our friend saw a big fireball. Little did we know that it was when the second plane hit. We were quite traumatised and went back to our hotel to just watch the TV. We tried to call home, but all the phone lines were not working. Finally I managed to connect to a local dial up internet number and sent messages that we were fine through that. Thank God for the resilience of the internet...

This year, in February, I went back to the 9/11 memorial when I was in New York for a conference. It was the first time I've been back since 2001. It was quite a moving experience as I watched, read and learned about what happened that day as we watched from 4 miles away.

This event has affected everyone in different ways. For me, being there on that day, made a special connection for me with the people of NYC as we have a strong shared experience.

Wide Angle Productions

Link

This is a video that Andrew, one of the Wide Angle Production staff did about the vision of using video and stories to reach out.

1st month at Singapore Campus Crusade for Christ

Wow. Time sure flies fast. It's officially been a month since 1 started at SCCC on 15th July. It's been interesting time. Attended the U.S. conference, then came back a week ago, and right now settling into the office and starting work planning for a Creative Communications dinner later this month. Also doing some serious strategic thinking about what possible steps to take ahead for the group.

What a trip!! CSU-SF-Vancouver part 4

After the adventure going across the bay from Oakland to SF, we dropped Eeleen and Evon off at a restaurant with their relatives in the Richmond district. Finally having some legroom, we drove to another part of Richmond for dinner at a restaurant my friend recommended called Yet Wah. It took us a very long time to find a parking space. We went round and round the blocks but couldn't find a place (which is pretty common in this part of SF). I was also concerned about the bags in the car if we parked it in a remote place. Finally we remembered to pray.... and not 2 minutes later, we saw someone getting out from a spot. After we pulled in, we realised that it was right in front of the restaurant!! Praise God for His miracles!! We even got a table in full view of the car.

The dinner was nice.... at last... good Chinese food.... The crowd was interesting too. Quite a mixed race crowd, and strangely only a few Chinese people for this part of SF.

Went back to church dorms for the night. I had mass media training the next day, Sara took a drive into the city by herself and Carl was so tired he slept in until noon. We had a nice Vietnamese lunch meeting with Phil to talk about media and music ministries. The evening, Carl and Sara took a walking "Vampire" tour of SF's Nob Hill area. The next day, they left for Mountain View and then to Monterey to continue their drive to LA.

Off to the US and Canada

Leaving this afternoon for about 20 days to the US and Canada. Will be passing through San Francisco, then heading to Fort Collins, CO for Campus Crusade U.S. Staff conference, back to SF, then to Vancouver to visit my sister who just gave birth. Most likely will be my only trip to the US this year, so making the best of it.

Starting my STINT with SCCC

Wow. Finally had my interview today for STINT and was accepted into the 1 year STINT with Creative Communications of Singapore Campus Crusade for Christ for the next year. I officially start on 15th July. In the mean time, I'll be off to the US on Friday 13th July. San Francisco stopover, Fort Collins, CO for the U.S, CCC staff conference and then to Vancouver to visit my youngest sister Julia and husband Adrian and to see their new baby and my newest niece, Natalie.
Will be away until 6th August.

Looking forward to interesting times in the year ahead.

Strange experience

Today I went to the Mandai Crematorium for the first time. It's such a surreal place. Almost reminds me of an airport except where you're sending people off to is forever. In Singapore's efficient manner, everything is laid out in such a way that your path from the bus or carpark is carefully planned so that it facilitates good human traffic flow. It reminds me of how it is like in Disneyland.... what a strange experience. You take an escalator up to the top, enter the assigned hall and walk down the steps to a seat for the service. Then the door in front opens automatically and silently and someone pushes the coffin in using a motorised pallet truck. The service is held, then everyone comes forward to say their last goodbyes. Then the same door silently opens and they wheel the coffin back out. A side door opens and all the people are ushered to another hallway into another room with a view of the place where they cremate the body. Unlike the old Mount Vernon crematorium, there is no one that pushes the body into the furnace. Instead, the automated forklift with the coffin automatically goes along rails hidden in the floor towards one of 3 furnaces. A set of wooden doors automatically open, the coffin goes in, the forklift lifts the coffin up, the furnace door opens, the forklift pushes the coffin in, and then the wooden doors close obscuring your view of what happens next. That's how you say good bye to your family or friend.
It all felt so cold and efficient.
The only thing different about this place from Disneyland is that it is not handicapped friendly. Considering that many people who die of old age have friends and family of that age, there is no provision of ramps for wheelchairs. There sure are lots of steps.

Parable Project

I spent a good part of the last 3 weeks teaching at the Parable Project.
The Parable Project is a 3 week training course on making short films for 14 students from Singapore Campus Crusade for Christ. The showing was on Friday 15 Jun 2007 at the SubStation which I missed as I was away in Malacca for church camp.
Below are the 3 videos. A Sticky Affair was shot by the staff as a demonstration shoot.

Showhand

A Sticky Affair

Shoes Anonymous

Soul 2 Soul performances

I'm currently helping with sound and video for Forerunner's new band Soul2Soul. Soul2Soul is a band that plays pop music from the 80s and 90s talking about love. It's fronted by Sharon Mah. Forerunner is Singapore Campus Crusade for Christ's music ministry. For more info, see
http://www.forerunner.org.sg
http://s2sonline.multiply.com

Going home

Wow. What a week it's been. Tonight I leave for Singapore, ending the latest 1 year chapter of my life.
This past week saw 2 ChristmaSing productions at the Scottish Rites auditorium where we shot video with multiple cameras. We also had 2 Christmas eve services in church. I spent most of yesterday, Christmas day, packing, doing laundry, cleaning and settling stuff in the room. Today, I'll be finally selling my car.
Not quite sure what I'll be doing after getting back yet. Still praying for God to reveal to me his directions and plans for me.

Cornerstone Singers Testimony Video

I shot this video for the Cornerstone Singers Concert in October 2006. Shot with Sony HVR-Z1U and PDX-10.

Cornerstone Academy Kindergarten Promo video

Hi Everyone.
This is a promotional video that I did for Cornerstone Academy's kindergarten. This was an opportunity for me to use different skills in doing this video. I came up with the concept in consulting with the school management, scripted, arranged the interviews, did lighting and camerawork for most of the video, edited and made the DVD. Of course I had some help from others. Enjoy and give me your comments.

Last 2 weeks here

Things to do before I leave SF.
1. Video tape Cantonese ChristmaSing performance on 16th Dec, 2 shows.
2. Set up and videotape English ChristmaSing performance at Scottish Rites Auditorium on 22nd and 23rd Dec.
3. Editing and mixdown Piano CD
4. Pack office
5. Pay off car loan
6. Sell car
7. Terminate DirecTv satellite TV subscription and return equipment
8. Terminate phone line
9. Terminate broadband
10.Terminate Li Soon's cell phone
11. Pack bags
12. Pick up new Macbook Pro

Going home

It's been an extremely long time since my last blog. A lot has happened since.
First the most important. We will be going back to Singapore. Little Nathan's already there since October. Li Soon and Matthew are leaving on Dec 11th at 0005 hrs. I will be leaving on the same flight on Dec 27th.
This morning, the shippers came and picked up our boxes, all 29 of them. Not really that much, cos we didn't ship any furniture or electrical applicances. Came up to about 90+ cu ft.
I just finished the series of school Christmas performances. There were 9 of them over the past 5 days. 2 per day. This morning we had a retake as we messed up the recording on one of them.
Will blog a bit more later when I get back from last minute shopping for Li Soon.

A tribute to my friend Irene Cheung

To be read at Irene's funeral

So sweet a rose, but oh so short,
through all the thorns, the pleasure brings.
Now all that’s left, that’s etched in time,
the memories, the happy things.
Harry Chua

I first knew Irene when she came to work in Singapore for my family’s business 10 years ago. She was my sister’s friend and church-mate from Vancouver B.C. and she helped us manage operations and marketing. Irene went back to Vancouver after about a year.

Because of the distances between Singapore and Vancouver, Irene and I communicated mostly through email and Instant Messaging. I am a person who keeps all my emails and messages, and as I searched through the messages, I came upon one of the first emails in 1998. Irene had asked me to write a reference letter for her immigration application to Canada.

Irene put in extraordinary effort in whatever she did. She worked in an accounting firm, and she was meticulous in her audits. One time, she asked me to send her special pens of many different colours from Singapore, so that she could mark up her audit notes in different colours for the different issues she found. She worked hard, going into the office at 5 am in the morning so that there would be fewer distractions. I’m sure her bosses loved her, delivering top quality work at great speed. She even asked for more work when she felt that she didn’t have enough to do, and even took work with her on her vacations. She was due for a promotion to manager.

Why did she work so hard? Two Saturdays ago, on Sept 30, she spent the afternoon with my wife Li Soon. Irene lived by herself in Vancouver, B.C., and while she had many good friends there, her family and closest loved ones were all over the world. Li Soon remembers Irene saying that she works hard to accumulate her overtime hours so that she can spend time with her loved ones. She traded in the hours to go to San Francisco to visit her sister, to Hong Kong to visit her mom and to Indonesia to visit her nanny. She treasured family relationships very much.
It was during one of these visits to Asia last year that she stopped and stayed with us in Singapore before we moved to San Francisco. We had a rare chance to spend some extended time with her.

Rebekah, one of Irene’s closest friends reminded me that it was in this past year that Irene had a chance to renew and reconnect with friends and family all over the world. Irene was planning to move to Asia soon, to be closer to her ageing mom who lived in Hong Kong. Therefore, she made sure to catch up with her friends in Vancouver. Having not seen Irene in person for many years, it was indeed God’s timing and grace that I was able to meet with her 5 times in less than a year in Singapore, Vancouver and San Francisco. I thank God for every opportunity He had provided.

Irene always thought of the people she loved. One time, I was in San Francisco for business and it happened to be Irene’s sister Eva’s birthday. Irene asked me to go to Tiffany’s to pick up a gift for Eva and to help her deliver it to Eva’s workplace. This year, when she knew that my family was going to Vancouver to visit my sister there, Irene ordered some medication online for her friend’s mom and asked us to bring it with us to Vancouver. Even when she was in San Francisco, she was helping her friend with her wedding invitation.

I don’t know why God puts different people in our lives. I am grateful that He allowed me the blessing to be a friend of Irene’s. As sad as I am to lose a friend so young, I am comforted and secure in the hope that because Irene loved the Lord Jesus Christ, I will one day see her again in heaven for eternity.

This next verse that was at the end of the first email Irene sent me in 1998.
It speaks to me more powerful today than ever and I would like to share it with you.

Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.
For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living
Psalms 116: 7-9

The Day God chose for my friend Irene to meet Him

Firstly, I want to thank everyone who has prayed for us and for those who have been so supporting in word and deed. Even though Li Soon and Nathan are far away in Singapore, your prayers, care and concern and actions have helped Matthew and I more than mere words can say.

My friend Irene Cheung was in town to visit her sister and brother-in-law who had just had their first baby boy. On Saturday, Sept 30, she came to where we lived, where she spent the afternoon with Li Soon, Matthew and Nathan while I was away at the Scottish Rites auditorium preparing for the Cornerstone Singers concert that night. Li Soon remembers the good time they had sharing, talking and watching a movie together. That night, Irene drove to the auditorium to attend the concert and also helped out with the packing up. We said that we might meet up again during the week she was here. Li Soon and Nathan left for Singapore the next day.

On Wednesday, Oct 4, we decided to go for dinner at Sushi Sam's in San Mateo. It was a restaurant that she liked to visit every time she was here in SF. That day was the first rain of the season here, and I reminded myself to be extra careful in driving as the roads will be slick. At 5pm, I picked Matthew up from school, got him changed and then drove to Brisbane where Irene was staying with here sister. There was only a slight drizzle at that time.
After picking her up, we drove down 101 to San Mateo. At Millbrae, the freeway was all jammed up, and so I took the exit and went down El Camino Real instead. I found a parking spot 1 block away from the restaurant and we walked there.
We had a good time that night at dinner. Matthew ordered his favourite Tamago Maki, teriyaki chicken and rice and miso soup. Then Irene proceeded to order all her favourite food. We had so much to eat. We talked about the concert, about her work, about my plans to go back to Singapore and other things. She also had a good time playing with Matthew. I've never really seen Matthew take to someone who he didn't know well as easily as he did with her. They talked a lot and Matthew ate a lot.

After I paid for dinner, she pointed out the owner to me as we walked out of the restaurant. It was a heavy drizzle outside, so Matthew and I put up the hoods of our jackets. Irene did not have a hood. We walked 3 abreast, hand in hand towards the car. Irene was on the left, Matthew in the middle and I was on the right nearest to the traffic. We came to the intersection of Ellesworth and 3rd Ave where the light just turned red on us. We waited there for the lights to change. When the lights changed, we all walked across the crossing.

We never saw the car coming. About 1/2 way through the crossing, I found myself flying through the air after apparently being hit by the car from the right. I was thrown 10 feet to the left and landed on the ground. After orientating myself, I started to look for Matthew and Irene and to see what hit us. I found Matthew lying on the floor about another 10 feet from me, looking shocked but conscious. I immediately went to him and asked him if he was ok, and if he had any broken bones or pain anywhere. To my amazement and intense relief, he was able to get up and walk. Apparently, he had gone under the car and out the other side. I took him to the sidewalk and did a quick check to make sure he wasn't hurt. It was obvious he had a scratch or burn just above the right eyebrow. He had a bump on the back of his head and had scratches on his right leg. He started to throw up due to the shock. By that time, there were quite a few people gathered and I made sure that someone took care of him. Then I went to look for Irene expecting to see her on the floor or something. About another 10-20 feet from where Matthew was found, I saw the car that hit us and found Irene pinned under it. At that point, I was shocked. I couldn't reach her, and I tried to call 911 on my cell phone for the police and fire department. Unfortunately, 911 calls from cell phones are automatically directed to California Highway Patrol. Apparently there were many calls, so I was put on hold and I decided to hang up. I yelled out for someone to call 911 on a landline and someone said they already did. I went to where Irene's right hand was sticking out from under the car and tried to feel for a pulse. I remembered that her fingers were still clutched in the position of holding Matthew's hand and I pried some of them open to hold her hand. I couldn't feel any pulse and realised the possibility that the worst had happened. There was a pool of blood mixed with the rain flowing out from under the car where her head was. I took out my flashlight and shone it under the car and I could only faintly make out her body. I started to call out Irene's name to see if she could still hear me. There was a guy next to me who kept yelling out for Irene to hang on...

Finally, the police and fire department came. I went back to Matthew to make sure that he was still ok. A nice older lady named Valerie had taken him into a police car and sat and talked with him. Thank God Matthew didn't see anything. I told Matthew that Irene had most likely gone to be with God.

I saw the firemen using jacks and the airbag to try to raise the car to pull Irene out. A policeman took me aside to take my information and report. I felt so cold and threw up a few times as well. It was only then that I realised that my right hip/thigh hurt and my right leg hurt. My right leg had scratches from the fall, but I couldn't see what happened to my thigh.

I called Li Soon to tell her that Matthew and I were in an accident and were ok, but the Irene was most likely gone home to be with the Lord. She was definitely shocked. I said I'll call her back later when things were more settled.

After taking my statement, the paramedics brought me to Matthew, we was in a neck brace and on the stretcher in an ambulance. I talked to Matthew and decided it best that he got medical attention. As I felt relatively ok, I asked not to be treated right then, as it would have meant us going in different ambulances and even to different beds or hospitals. So I sat with him and the Paramedic for the seemingly long 15 min ride to Stanford Medical Centre. Apparently they brought us there as Matthew was not seriously hurt and they had a good emergency pediatric department.

On the way to the ambulance, I asked the police officer if it was bad news for my friend, and he said yes. I also gave him the address of Irene's sister's house and asked them to contact them. He advised me that I should let them inform the family as they are trained for that and that I was certainly in no position at that point to tell them myself.

On the ambulance, I called Li Soon and Phil. Li Soon to assure her that we were ok, and that we were going to the hospital to check just in case. Phil to tell him and to ask him to come down to the hospital.

They took Matthew to the emergency room and did a check on him. Thankfully he was fine all round. The hospital gave Matthew a set of clothes as his was all wet. He had also left one shoe at the scene, but they could only give him a pair of dry socks. After a pretty long wait, we finally were discharged and met Phil and Toney in the waiting room. They had come together. We had to drive back to the San Mateo police department where I gave my statement to the investigating officer. After that, we went back to the scene where I walked the officer through what I remembered of what happened. Matthew stayed in the car with Phil at that time. After that, Toney drove my car home, while we went with Phil.

Thankfully, Matthew was able to sleep in the car, and once we got home, he changed and went to sleep. I was really thankful for that. I talked for about an hour with Phil and Toney before I went to bed. I definitely didn't sleep much that night. The scene kept playing back continuously on a loop in my mind. I woke up at every move that Matthew made, but thanked God that he managed to sleep through the night.


Matthew's small wound above the eye


Matthew's leg


Matthew in the hospital bed with the new set of clothes.


This is one of the few pictures I have of Irene from her CGA graduation in 2004. I don't know who her friend is.