To be read at Irene's funeral
So sweet a rose, but oh so short,
through all the thorns, the pleasure brings.
Now all that’s left, that’s etched in time,
the memories, the happy things.
Harry Chua
I first knew Irene when she came to work in Singapore for my family’s business 10 years ago. She was my sister’s friend and church-mate from Vancouver B.C. and she helped us manage operations and marketing. Irene went back to Vancouver after about a year.
Because of the distances between Singapore and Vancouver, Irene and I communicated mostly through email and Instant Messaging. I am a person who keeps all my emails and messages, and as I searched through the messages, I came upon one of the first emails in 1998. Irene had asked me to write a reference letter for her immigration application to Canada.
Irene put in extraordinary effort in whatever she did. She worked in an accounting firm, and she was meticulous in her audits. One time, she asked me to send her special pens of many different colours from Singapore, so that she could mark up her audit notes in different colours for the different issues she found. She worked hard, going into the office at 5 am in the morning so that there would be fewer distractions. I’m sure her bosses loved her, delivering top quality work at great speed. She even asked for more work when she felt that she didn’t have enough to do, and even took work with her on her vacations. She was due for a promotion to manager.
Why did she work so hard? Two Saturdays ago, on Sept 30, she spent the afternoon with my wife Li Soon. Irene lived by herself in Vancouver, B.C., and while she had many good friends there, her family and closest loved ones were all over the world. Li Soon remembers Irene saying that she works hard to accumulate her overtime hours so that she can spend time with her loved ones. She traded in the hours to go to San Francisco to visit her sister, to Hong Kong to visit her mom and to Indonesia to visit her nanny. She treasured family relationships very much.
It was during one of these visits to Asia last year that she stopped and stayed with us in Singapore before we moved to San Francisco. We had a rare chance to spend some extended time with her.
Rebekah, one of Irene’s closest friends reminded me that it was in this past year that Irene had a chance to renew and reconnect with friends and family all over the world. Irene was planning to move to Asia soon, to be closer to her ageing mom who lived in Hong Kong. Therefore, she made sure to catch up with her friends in Vancouver. Having not seen Irene in person for many years, it was indeed God’s timing and grace that I was able to meet with her 5 times in less than a year in Singapore, Vancouver and San Francisco. I thank God for every opportunity He had provided.
Irene always thought of the people she loved. One time, I was in San Francisco for business and it happened to be Irene’s sister Eva’s birthday. Irene asked me to go to Tiffany’s to pick up a gift for Eva and to help her deliver it to Eva’s workplace. This year, when she knew that my family was going to Vancouver to visit my sister there, Irene ordered some medication online for her friend’s mom and asked us to bring it with us to Vancouver. Even when she was in San Francisco, she was helping her friend with her wedding invitation.
I don’t know why God puts different people in our lives. I am grateful that He allowed me the blessing to be a friend of Irene’s. As sad as I am to lose a friend so young, I am comforted and secure in the hope that because Irene loved the Lord Jesus Christ, I will one day see her again in heaven for eternity.
This next verse that was at the end of the first email Irene sent me in 1998.
It speaks to me more powerful today than ever and I would like to share it with you.
Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.
For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling,
that I may walk before the Lord in the land of the living
Psalms 116: 7-9
Saturday, October 14, 2006
Sunday, October 08, 2006
The Day God chose for my friend Irene to meet Him
Firstly, I want to thank everyone who has prayed for us and for those who have been so supporting in word and deed. Even though Li Soon and Nathan are far away in Singapore, your prayers, care and concern and actions have helped Matthew and I more than mere words can say.
My friend Irene Cheung was in town to visit her sister and brother-in-law who had just had their first baby boy. On Saturday, Sept 30, she came to where we lived, where she spent the afternoon with Li Soon, Matthew and Nathan while I was away at the Scottish Rites auditorium preparing for the Cornerstone Singers concert that night. Li Soon remembers the good time they had sharing, talking and watching a movie together. That night, Irene drove to the auditorium to attend the concert and also helped out with the packing up. We said that we might meet up again during the week she was here. Li Soon and Nathan left for Singapore the next day.
On Wednesday, Oct 4, we decided to go for dinner at Sushi Sam's in San Mateo. It was a restaurant that she liked to visit every time she was here in SF. That day was the first rain of the season here, and I reminded myself to be extra careful in driving as the roads will be slick. At 5pm, I picked Matthew up from school, got him changed and then drove to Brisbane where Irene was staying with here sister. There was only a slight drizzle at that time.
After picking her up, we drove down 101 to San Mateo. At Millbrae, the freeway was all jammed up, and so I took the exit and went down El Camino Real instead. I found a parking spot 1 block away from the restaurant and we walked there.
We had a good time that night at dinner. Matthew ordered his favourite Tamago Maki, teriyaki chicken and rice and miso soup. Then Irene proceeded to order all her favourite food. We had so much to eat. We talked about the concert, about her work, about my plans to go back to Singapore and other things. She also had a good time playing with Matthew. I've never really seen Matthew take to someone who he didn't know well as easily as he did with her. They talked a lot and Matthew ate a lot.
After I paid for dinner, she pointed out the owner to me as we walked out of the restaurant. It was a heavy drizzle outside, so Matthew and I put up the hoods of our jackets. Irene did not have a hood. We walked 3 abreast, hand in hand towards the car. Irene was on the left, Matthew in the middle and I was on the right nearest to the traffic. We came to the intersection of Ellesworth and 3rd Ave where the light just turned red on us. We waited there for the lights to change. When the lights changed, we all walked across the crossing.
We never saw the car coming. About 1/2 way through the crossing, I found myself flying through the air after apparently being hit by the car from the right. I was thrown 10 feet to the left and landed on the ground. After orientating myself, I started to look for Matthew and Irene and to see what hit us. I found Matthew lying on the floor about another 10 feet from me, looking shocked but conscious. I immediately went to him and asked him if he was ok, and if he had any broken bones or pain anywhere. To my amazement and intense relief, he was able to get up and walk. Apparently, he had gone under the car and out the other side. I took him to the sidewalk and did a quick check to make sure he wasn't hurt. It was obvious he had a scratch or burn just above the right eyebrow. He had a bump on the back of his head and had scratches on his right leg. He started to throw up due to the shock. By that time, there were quite a few people gathered and I made sure that someone took care of him. Then I went to look for Irene expecting to see her on the floor or something. About another 10-20 feet from where Matthew was found, I saw the car that hit us and found Irene pinned under it. At that point, I was shocked. I couldn't reach her, and I tried to call 911 on my cell phone for the police and fire department. Unfortunately, 911 calls from cell phones are automatically directed to California Highway Patrol. Apparently there were many calls, so I was put on hold and I decided to hang up. I yelled out for someone to call 911 on a landline and someone said they already did. I went to where Irene's right hand was sticking out from under the car and tried to feel for a pulse. I remembered that her fingers were still clutched in the position of holding Matthew's hand and I pried some of them open to hold her hand. I couldn't feel any pulse and realised the possibility that the worst had happened. There was a pool of blood mixed with the rain flowing out from under the car where her head was. I took out my flashlight and shone it under the car and I could only faintly make out her body. I started to call out Irene's name to see if she could still hear me. There was a guy next to me who kept yelling out for Irene to hang on...
Finally, the police and fire department came. I went back to Matthew to make sure that he was still ok. A nice older lady named Valerie had taken him into a police car and sat and talked with him. Thank God Matthew didn't see anything. I told Matthew that Irene had most likely gone to be with God.
I saw the firemen using jacks and the airbag to try to raise the car to pull Irene out. A policeman took me aside to take my information and report. I felt so cold and threw up a few times as well. It was only then that I realised that my right hip/thigh hurt and my right leg hurt. My right leg had scratches from the fall, but I couldn't see what happened to my thigh.
I called Li Soon to tell her that Matthew and I were in an accident and were ok, but the Irene was most likely gone home to be with the Lord. She was definitely shocked. I said I'll call her back later when things were more settled.
After taking my statement, the paramedics brought me to Matthew, we was in a neck brace and on the stretcher in an ambulance. I talked to Matthew and decided it best that he got medical attention. As I felt relatively ok, I asked not to be treated right then, as it would have meant us going in different ambulances and even to different beds or hospitals. So I sat with him and the Paramedic for the seemingly long 15 min ride to Stanford Medical Centre. Apparently they brought us there as Matthew was not seriously hurt and they had a good emergency pediatric department.
On the way to the ambulance, I asked the police officer if it was bad news for my friend, and he said yes. I also gave him the address of Irene's sister's house and asked them to contact them. He advised me that I should let them inform the family as they are trained for that and that I was certainly in no position at that point to tell them myself.
On the ambulance, I called Li Soon and Phil. Li Soon to assure her that we were ok, and that we were going to the hospital to check just in case. Phil to tell him and to ask him to come down to the hospital.
They took Matthew to the emergency room and did a check on him. Thankfully he was fine all round. The hospital gave Matthew a set of clothes as his was all wet. He had also left one shoe at the scene, but they could only give him a pair of dry socks. After a pretty long wait, we finally were discharged and met Phil and Toney in the waiting room. They had come together. We had to drive back to the San Mateo police department where I gave my statement to the investigating officer. After that, we went back to the scene where I walked the officer through what I remembered of what happened. Matthew stayed in the car with Phil at that time. After that, Toney drove my car home, while we went with Phil.
Thankfully, Matthew was able to sleep in the car, and once we got home, he changed and went to sleep. I was really thankful for that. I talked for about an hour with Phil and Toney before I went to bed. I definitely didn't sleep much that night. The scene kept playing back continuously on a loop in my mind. I woke up at every move that Matthew made, but thanked God that he managed to sleep through the night.
Matthew's small wound above the eye
Matthew's leg
Matthew in the hospital bed with the new set of clothes.
This is one of the few pictures I have of Irene from her CGA graduation in 2004. I don't know who her friend is.
My friend Irene Cheung was in town to visit her sister and brother-in-law who had just had their first baby boy. On Saturday, Sept 30, she came to where we lived, where she spent the afternoon with Li Soon, Matthew and Nathan while I was away at the Scottish Rites auditorium preparing for the Cornerstone Singers concert that night. Li Soon remembers the good time they had sharing, talking and watching a movie together. That night, Irene drove to the auditorium to attend the concert and also helped out with the packing up. We said that we might meet up again during the week she was here. Li Soon and Nathan left for Singapore the next day.
On Wednesday, Oct 4, we decided to go for dinner at Sushi Sam's in San Mateo. It was a restaurant that she liked to visit every time she was here in SF. That day was the first rain of the season here, and I reminded myself to be extra careful in driving as the roads will be slick. At 5pm, I picked Matthew up from school, got him changed and then drove to Brisbane where Irene was staying with here sister. There was only a slight drizzle at that time.
After picking her up, we drove down 101 to San Mateo. At Millbrae, the freeway was all jammed up, and so I took the exit and went down El Camino Real instead. I found a parking spot 1 block away from the restaurant and we walked there.
We had a good time that night at dinner. Matthew ordered his favourite Tamago Maki, teriyaki chicken and rice and miso soup. Then Irene proceeded to order all her favourite food. We had so much to eat. We talked about the concert, about her work, about my plans to go back to Singapore and other things. She also had a good time playing with Matthew. I've never really seen Matthew take to someone who he didn't know well as easily as he did with her. They talked a lot and Matthew ate a lot.
After I paid for dinner, she pointed out the owner to me as we walked out of the restaurant. It was a heavy drizzle outside, so Matthew and I put up the hoods of our jackets. Irene did not have a hood. We walked 3 abreast, hand in hand towards the car. Irene was on the left, Matthew in the middle and I was on the right nearest to the traffic. We came to the intersection of Ellesworth and 3rd Ave where the light just turned red on us. We waited there for the lights to change. When the lights changed, we all walked across the crossing.
We never saw the car coming. About 1/2 way through the crossing, I found myself flying through the air after apparently being hit by the car from the right. I was thrown 10 feet to the left and landed on the ground. After orientating myself, I started to look for Matthew and Irene and to see what hit us. I found Matthew lying on the floor about another 10 feet from me, looking shocked but conscious. I immediately went to him and asked him if he was ok, and if he had any broken bones or pain anywhere. To my amazement and intense relief, he was able to get up and walk. Apparently, he had gone under the car and out the other side. I took him to the sidewalk and did a quick check to make sure he wasn't hurt. It was obvious he had a scratch or burn just above the right eyebrow. He had a bump on the back of his head and had scratches on his right leg. He started to throw up due to the shock. By that time, there were quite a few people gathered and I made sure that someone took care of him. Then I went to look for Irene expecting to see her on the floor or something. About another 10-20 feet from where Matthew was found, I saw the car that hit us and found Irene pinned under it. At that point, I was shocked. I couldn't reach her, and I tried to call 911 on my cell phone for the police and fire department. Unfortunately, 911 calls from cell phones are automatically directed to California Highway Patrol. Apparently there were many calls, so I was put on hold and I decided to hang up. I yelled out for someone to call 911 on a landline and someone said they already did. I went to where Irene's right hand was sticking out from under the car and tried to feel for a pulse. I remembered that her fingers were still clutched in the position of holding Matthew's hand and I pried some of them open to hold her hand. I couldn't feel any pulse and realised the possibility that the worst had happened. There was a pool of blood mixed with the rain flowing out from under the car where her head was. I took out my flashlight and shone it under the car and I could only faintly make out her body. I started to call out Irene's name to see if she could still hear me. There was a guy next to me who kept yelling out for Irene to hang on...
Finally, the police and fire department came. I went back to Matthew to make sure that he was still ok. A nice older lady named Valerie had taken him into a police car and sat and talked with him. Thank God Matthew didn't see anything. I told Matthew that Irene had most likely gone to be with God.
I saw the firemen using jacks and the airbag to try to raise the car to pull Irene out. A policeman took me aside to take my information and report. I felt so cold and threw up a few times as well. It was only then that I realised that my right hip/thigh hurt and my right leg hurt. My right leg had scratches from the fall, but I couldn't see what happened to my thigh.
I called Li Soon to tell her that Matthew and I were in an accident and were ok, but the Irene was most likely gone home to be with the Lord. She was definitely shocked. I said I'll call her back later when things were more settled.
After taking my statement, the paramedics brought me to Matthew, we was in a neck brace and on the stretcher in an ambulance. I talked to Matthew and decided it best that he got medical attention. As I felt relatively ok, I asked not to be treated right then, as it would have meant us going in different ambulances and even to different beds or hospitals. So I sat with him and the Paramedic for the seemingly long 15 min ride to Stanford Medical Centre. Apparently they brought us there as Matthew was not seriously hurt and they had a good emergency pediatric department.
On the way to the ambulance, I asked the police officer if it was bad news for my friend, and he said yes. I also gave him the address of Irene's sister's house and asked them to contact them. He advised me that I should let them inform the family as they are trained for that and that I was certainly in no position at that point to tell them myself.
On the ambulance, I called Li Soon and Phil. Li Soon to assure her that we were ok, and that we were going to the hospital to check just in case. Phil to tell him and to ask him to come down to the hospital.
They took Matthew to the emergency room and did a check on him. Thankfully he was fine all round. The hospital gave Matthew a set of clothes as his was all wet. He had also left one shoe at the scene, but they could only give him a pair of dry socks. After a pretty long wait, we finally were discharged and met Phil and Toney in the waiting room. They had come together. We had to drive back to the San Mateo police department where I gave my statement to the investigating officer. After that, we went back to the scene where I walked the officer through what I remembered of what happened. Matthew stayed in the car with Phil at that time. After that, Toney drove my car home, while we went with Phil.
Thankfully, Matthew was able to sleep in the car, and once we got home, he changed and went to sleep. I was really thankful for that. I talked for about an hour with Phil and Toney before I went to bed. I definitely didn't sleep much that night. The scene kept playing back continuously on a loop in my mind. I woke up at every move that Matthew made, but thanked God that he managed to sleep through the night.
Matthew's small wound above the eye
Matthew's leg
Matthew in the hospital bed with the new set of clothes.
This is one of the few pictures I have of Irene from her CGA graduation in 2004. I don't know who her friend is.
Wednesday, October 04, 2006
Change of dates
For those of you who are expecting me to be back in Singapore right now, I must apologize for the misinformation. I have changed my flight to leave SFO 12th and arrive SIN 13th Oct. Li Soon and Nathan are back in Singapore now, as per the original plan. We'll be in Singapore until 25th Oct.
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